The Distance
by chatterbox-hikaru13
Summary: A person's sentiments on being separated from his love one and not being able to do anything about it.


AN: Uhm...one-shot. One person's POV. Guess who!!! Hahaha, I love secrets!!! Enjoy reading!!!  
  
DISCLAIMER: Magic Knight Rayearth? Not mine. I can't draw, I don't know how to draw, and the only drawing I have is a flower, way back in grade school. Yeah. That's all the drawing I've got. Oh! And my very close friend gave me a drawing of SD Hikaru, SD Umi and SD Fuu in a master board. It was really cute.   
  
THE DISTANCE  
  
The sky has lost its color  
The sun has turned to gray  
  
It was...what? Four, five months? I can't remember. Because ever since she went home, I've seen nothing around me but gloom. Everyday, every hour, every second of every minute, questions plagued my mind. Questions that I have no idea how to answer, or what to answer. So many questions swarmed by head like bees on a hive, questions worst than what I've been asking when the Pillar System was still here. Questions that blanketed my brain and invaded my heart.  
  
At least that's how it feels to me  
Whenever you're away  
  
Questions like...when will I see her again...?  
  
When will the clouds that hover in sky clear...?  
  
When will I see the sunshine again...?  
  
Her eyes...her smile...her face...when will I be able to touch her again...?  
  
I crawl up in a corner as I watched the minutes pass  
Each one brings me closer to the time you're coming back  
You're coming back  
  
I feel so pathetic. So helpless. So useless. There's nothing more than I can't take but waiting. Wait for the sun to shine. Wait for darkness to come. Wait for birds to fly. Wait for peace to be achieved. Wait for hope to become reality.  
  
Wait for her to return.  
  
Sometimes, all I do all day long is to gaze out in all of Cephiro and look for an opening, a junction, a road...anything...that would clue me of her return...but everyday I would return to the Castle disappointed.  
  
She's definitely nowhere in Cephiro.  
  
And I doubt if she'll be back.  
  
I can't take the distance, I can't take the miles  
I can't take the time until the next time I see your smile  
  
This has got to be the worst feeling I've ever felt. This feeling of utter lost and emptiness.  
  
Just because she's not here beside me.  
  
And that makes the whole thing different. Because our separation is something that I can't take and escape. The goddammed barrier between our worlds is what's keeping us to be with each other and be happy.  
  
I miss the way her eyes twinkle whenever she's excited or happy.  
  
I miss the way her cheeks redden whenever we get too close to each other.  
  
I miss the way her mouth curved up for a smile whenever she's contented or just because she wanted to.  
  
I can't take the distance and I'm not ashamed  
That I can't take a breath without saying your name  
  
I miss the way her hair flies whenever a breeze blows by.  
  
I miss the way she walks down the corridor and the way her hips sway from side to side.  
  
I miss the way she looks at me with intensity and so much love.  
  
But most of all, I miss HER above anything else.  
  
Damn. More and more I think she's the reason why I live, why I continue breathing.  
  
But now...I can't find the reason to continue on with my life...now that there seems to be no hope of seeing her again...  
  
And I can brave a hurricane and still be standing tall when all the dusk has settled down  
But I can't take the distance. The distance.  
  
Way back then, back when Cephiro was still in hellish war and destruction, I fought with all the courage and determination I could summon because I know that I'm not only fighting for the well being of Cephiro, but also for her safety. It was such an ironic thing to think that I am more worried for her than I am worried for the land where I grew up and defended once upon a time.  
  
All these because I fell in love with a magical girl from another world.  
  
I am strong. I am full of confidence. I am fearless. I know that. If not for those traits, I wouldn't be picked by Master Mage Clef as Princess Emeraude's captain of the guards. I faced all types of enemies, would it be human or monster, and I prevailed. But it seems that I will be accepting my very first defeat in my 465 years of existence.  
  
I cannot take the distance between me and my beloved Fire Knight.  
  
I still believe my feelings  
But sometime I feel too much  
  
Sometimes I think that this is only a dream, a nightmare, and I'd wake up not wanting and needing and waiting for that one person who captured my heart and made a difference in my dark life. That I'd be out of this crazy pattern in my life and be able to live just like before.  
  
But everyday I wake up in my bed, inside my dark, cold cell, and reality grips on my head. This is real. And I can't escape it.  
  
I feel pain, and I can't do anything with it.  
  
Because even if I try to drive her away from my thoughts, I only feel pain even more, and I miss her stronger.  
  
I make believe you're close to me  
But it ain't close enough, not nearly close enough  
  
So what do I do? I resort to the only thing I knew that would bring me joy.  
  
I slip back from reality to dream, where I see Hikaru.  
  
And feel her. And touch her. And be with her.  
  
In my dream, I am happy because she's with me, because we don't part our ways in dreamland.  
  
We stay together as long as we want.  
  
But then, when it's time for me to return to reality, the pain comes back, and it's much stronger and in full force. The feeling of loss and incomplete is back, and I'm thrown into a world with no Hikaru again.  
  
No smile. No feeling. No life.  
  
She did not only take my heart, but also my spark of life.  
  
Because I am practically a dead soul even though I'm still an alive man.  
  
I can't take the distance, I can't take the miles  
I can't take the time until the next time I see your smile  
I can't take the distance and I'm not ashamed  
That I can't take a breath without saying your name  
And I can brave a hurricane and still be standing tall when all the dust has settled down  
But I can't take the distance  
The distance...  
  
There's nothing much worse but to love and not feel the love at the same time. To be free and yet, not. To feel happiness and be robbed of it the next second.  
  
And there's nothing more painful than to be separated from your love one because destiny does not allow of your love.  
  
Life indeed, is unfair. What mankind unites, destiny divides.  
  
THE END  
  
AN: Think this would pass as an angst fic? Tell me what you think! Flames are very much appreciated!!!   
  
Peace, men!!!  
  
(.)-(.) 


End file.
